8 Things Bloggers Wish Their Friends Knew

We all love our friends but there are a few things we wish they knew about the world of blogging.

When I started my blog I had no idea how much time, energy, emotion and love it would take.

Time away from my friends. Energy just to make sure I’d shared it on every single marketing platform I could. Emotions like excitement from a post well received sadness from rejection from contributor opportunities, joy from hitting a new milestone, anger from troll like comments,etc. Love for knowing I was connecting with people and possibly helping them.

To be honest the hardest part has been the amount of time it takes and while I believe it’s worth it, it was a huge adjustment.

When you join the blogger community you fall in love! Everyone (for the most part) is so supportive, offering guidance and a cyber ear. You hear a lot about how if you want to succeed you need a support system and boy is that true!

It was great for me finding my blogging tribe but what about my real world tribe? I have a great group of friends who, to be honest, I know I’ve been slightly less available for since starting my blogging journey. Here are some things I think most bloggers would agree, we wish our non-blogger friends knew.

It takes a lot of time. I’m not blowing you off when I say “I need to work on my blog”

Running a successful blog in 21st century is a real job. We don’t go home at night, write about our day, press publish and watch the traffic (and passive income) roll in.

We create posting schedules, write, rewrite and edit like crazy. We meticulously market each post on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Google Plus, Medium and where every we can. We spend formally lazy Sunday afternoon watching Webinars about growing our brand and using Pinterest effectively (shout out to my blogosphere role model and  BFF Melyssa Griffin at Melyssa Griffin.com formally, The Nectar Collective for educating me constantly on this crazy amazing community). We are sending out emails to editors trying to get posts published on larger platforms.

We would love to go to that last-minute Happy Hour after work with you but we promised that editor a perfect draft first thing in the morning (and let me tell you drunk blogging rarely results in success).

I would love to go to Sunday Funday every Sunday but I have a newsletter to write. No matter how much we work there is always more to be done or more we could do.

I can’t commit to writing for a site just because “It’s cool.”

Some opportunities are great. Some opportunities pay, which is even better. When blogging you often have to pay your dues. I’ve written for money and also for publicity. So while you may think my dream would be to see my name on “that” website, it isn’t always worth it.

If I could just send over something I thought was a good fit and know it would be published that would be one thing, but having an editor reach out to you, then have to go back and forth for 5 drafts, to have their boss ultimately past is a waste of time (we could have went to Happy Hour).

Most bloggers are working towards blogging or freelancing full-time so every moment we spend is valuable. You wouldn’t go to work for free would you?

We have to know there is a reward for the work.

It’s not all sunshine and rainbows

I have an alarm on my phone for 10:30 p.m. Sunday-Thursday to tell me to turn off my laptop for the night… that almost always gets ignored.

Most Mondays and Thursdays I grab my laptop as soon as a wake up (early) to publish and promote that day’s post.

Sometimes I want to quit and give up because I’m so tired.

Sometimes I get paid less money than I spend on my water bill for an article I spent hours perfecting.

Sometimes people on social media or comment sections are unnecessarily cruel.

Sometimes I just want to go to happy hour and cry to Michelle about whatever thing is going on that week and stressing me out but I have a deadline or a webinar or mastermind group meeting.

I work all day then I go home and work all night. I love it but it’s a lot to balance.

Our office is anywhere and everywhere

I have written or done blog related activities in the following;

  • A hookah bar
  • A coffee shop
  • the airport
  • A bar
  • In my car on lunch
  • and the list goes on and on.

I have a work nook in my apartment but sometimes you need a change of scenery to get the creative juices flowing (and to stop yourself from watching another random Netflix movie with that really cute guy from that one show).

If you see me at Starbucks by myself I’m working. I’m not being anti-social, I promise.


I don’t know Zooey Deschanel

I’ve been fortunate enough to become a HelloGiggles contributor, the New Girl herself even shared one of my posts on Facebook (okay I’m bragging because it was this huge I made it moment for me…guess what I didn’t totally make it yet).

But I have never had conversation with her, well minus when I talk back to Jessica Day, watching New Girl.

I can’t get you free stuff (sorry) I get samples of things to try and honestly review (which I’ll admit is awesome). It takes time just like anything else I do for my business.

I don’t spend my whole “work time” on social media there is an app for that.

I know you see me posting at least once an hour on Twitter but I assure you I’m not ignoring your texts to see what the cast of Grey’s Anatomy is tweeting (okay maybe on Thursday night) look in the corner of that tweet… I use a social media app to keep myself present on social media. I spend about 15 minutes each night scheduling a day’s worth of posts in order to stay in front of people and on people’s minds. Everything is strategic.


Just because I built my blog doesn’t mean I’ll know how to hack your ex-boyfriend’s email account  

I am no tech genius. I spend many nights chatting with Siteground’s support staff asking, “Why is my website doing (or not doing) this?”

There are some awesome super user-friendly places to build your blog. While I like to think I know more than the average bear about maneuvering the world-wide web, I’ll be the first to tell you that when it comes to html and cyber semantics I am a bit of a dodo.

Most of the awesome things I’ve been able to do on my site are thanks to tech support and Google.


We really appreciate your support

Every time my best friend Karen shares one of my posts on Facebook, or my friend Bea asks, “How come I’m not on your blog,” I feel so loved.

Good Friends Give Your Support                                                      (Bea you made it love you! GO Saints! GO SPURS GO!)

 When in casual conversation someone says,” Oh I read your blog on ___________, it was hilarious,” I love it.

My blog really took off when I started to share it with the people I love, who love me.

We appreciate that while you may not understand why it takes up so much time, you read it and support us anyway.

Thank you to everyone who has supported my blog business and freelance career over the past year. I love you so much!

What are some things you wish you non-blogger friends knew?



    • I totally get that! Sometimes you don’t want to answer a million questions from a friend’s friend about how you got it up… this might sound bad but I sometimes think… I had to pay for this info or spent a lot of time to figure it to just give it away on my downtime lol

  1. I wish my friends knew how important their support was. As a blogger just starting up you need all the support you can get, but it would be way too cheesy to send them a love letter thanking them for their support! xxxx

    • I don’t think it’s cheesy at all! But maybe the next time you share a post or milestone on your personal social media including a line thanking them for their support.

  2. LOL – “just because I built my blog doesn’t mean I know how to hack your ex-boyfriend’s email account”. It’s so funny what people will ask you about when they find out you blog 🙂

  3. Oh, I loooove this – it’s so great to know other bloggers go through these same things! I wish MY non-blogging friends and family knew that even though they see me on my phone all the time, I’m not “playing” … I’m engaging with my followers by liking pictures on IG, or retweeting on Twitter, or replying to my blog comments. It’s wooooork to keep up with social media and it can be exhausting. 🙂

  4. YAS! This post essentially sums up everything I wish my non-blogging friends understood about blogging. Sometimes, they just don’t understand. I really think they believe I sit on Twitter all day or write in a coffee shop like a cliche movie!

  5. Thank you so much for this! I’m fairly new to blogging, but the amount of time it takes up is still unbelievable. I’m learning to strike a balance between blogging, spending time with my partner, and work (since I’m not earning anything from blogging… yet). I always feel bad for saying I need to work on my blog, and I never openly say that’s why I’m not free on a given evening when a friend asks. It feels like saying it wouldn’t be respected. I’m definitely sharing this on Twitter & Pinterest, thanks for the great post! 🙂

    • Awe thank you so much for sharing and commenting. They may not get it but that’s what bloggers friends are for 🙂 I’m going to check out your blog

  6. Very nice material. I’m glad you’re able make some sort of income at blogging. Right now, for me, my blog and YT channel are passive income at best. I do my best to keep posts up to snuff and interesting, but it’s not big enough to be my full time job yet. Maybe one day.

  7. These are so true!! I have been locked away in my room all day and everyone else in the house thinks I am being lazy. No, I spent hours working on a blog post and promoting it once it was published!

  8. LOVED this post, because I totally agree with everything! I’ve been telling more and more people just how much work running a blog is—so much more than just an online diary 😉 Going to share this tomorrow on my page!

  9. This is such a fun post! My friends all think it’s pretty cool that I tell them I get paid at times and I get a lot of free stuff. My brother especially, he made a blog but only did one post. He doesn’t have what it takes, hah.

  10. This is so relevant to me! Whenever I need to work on some blogging stuff I usually just tell my friends I have “some work” to do because I know if I say blog, they’ll understand even less. LOL @ hacking ex-boyfriends email. Great list, Dia.

    Melody // http://www.marevoli.com

    • Thanks Melody! Yeah I get a little more understanding since they’ve seen me in other publications but it’s still like.. “You’re always working” lol

    • I know! I think before it became so popular and there was less social media it was just writing and hitting publish but now there are so many elements.

  11. First off, Dia, congrats on getting the attention of Zoey!! That would have pasted a smile on my face for some time! All your points are so spot on. It’s so hard having to go to your “real job”, and work even harder at the job you really want. It takes SO much time, and I am still learning how to manage my time and batch better. It’s an ongoing process. Labor of love, but worth it….I think lol.

  12. Love this! And honestly while I only blog part time and in my free time, it applies to what I want my friends to know as I work from home for my regular full time job. Thanks for sharing and for reminding me there are a people out there who get it 😉

  13. So true I always get told that my blog is a ‘hobby’ and I have tell them quite crossly that it actually takes a lot of work and energy to run a blog. Blogging is a real job contrary to what people may think!

    • Haha mine came over one night and he said he had stuff to work on and I was like “good me to.” He later admitted he thought I just wrote stuff and that was it lol

  14. The main thing for me is, “Yes it is a job, a real one!”. I would love it when you tell people you are a blogger that they would receive it as any other career.

  15. Thank you so much for your candor and the truth of this post! I had no idea what a commitment blogging would be – the time devoted writing, photos, and well…. you KNOW the drill! I love it and so true about how friends react. I have some that are truly supportive and read my blog regularly … and then I have some that I least expected to not be supportive at all! But fellow bloggers – thank goodness – are supportive and for that I am truly grateful!

    • Yes fellow bloggers are my saving grace. Plus they know the little things that help you grow your brand and blog. A blogger friend will comment and share… a non-blogger friend will text you or tell you the next time they see you… it’s like comment on the blog please lol share with your friends lol

  16. these things are so true! i find that both with my blogging career and my acting career that my friends don’t get that i don’t have a set schedule but that also doesn’t mean that i don’t need to work on things for my career. i wish my friends knew how much i would appreciate if they like my blog links more often as an easy way to help spread the word

  17. This is great, Dia! I can relate to each one. It still surprises me when my non blogging friends say or ask these sort of things. I get it, if you’re not in it, you don’t know. But geez, a little support would be nice . Thanks for sharing!!

  18. Ok, my favorite is “Just because I built my blog doesn’t mean I’ll know how to hack your ex-boyfriend’s email account.” HAHA. I swear everybody thinks I’m the technical genius. I know nothing about your phone or computer so please don’t ask me! I accidentally deleted all of my father-in-laws important notes because he asked me to switch his email host. NEVER again. Great article, Dia!

  19. Oh my gosh Dia, its as if you are reading my mind – all so so so true!! I had no idea how much of work blogging was until I launched my own and there is no end to it, as in the number of things you can do is limitless. There’s no do these 10 things and you are done, there’s always that 11th thing you could do and promote your blog a bit more, and then the 12th, the list goes on!! But its amazing how many awesome people like you I get to meet through the blogging community, one of the many perks I’d say 🙂
    xx, Kusum | http://www.sveeteskapes.com

  20. Oh my gosh, just started my blog and neither myself nor my family can believe the time and effort that it is taking. That said, I am absolutely loving doing it!! Thanks for sharing this.

  21. I really dislike it when people says my blog is a hobby because they simply dont understand the amount of effort, time, effort, money put into it from writing, to photography and marketing and social media…gosh… great post!

  22. Thank you so much for writing this! A lot of my friends and family, although they’re supportive, don’t really “get” what I’m doing when I say I’m working. Like yes, I know I watch Netflix in a similar position sometimes, but I promise you, if I say I’m working, I’m working.

  23. feel very lucky when my friends supporting me and understand how much work I have with my blog. But unfortunately lots of people don’t know why people start to blogging and how much is means to them. They think just because its cool nowadays or for making money…

    • Any “negative” comment I get is people think it’s just a hobby or a diary. It can be a great source for supplemental income but I think you need to really enjoy it to be successful that way because it’s a lot of work if you aren’t enjoying it.

  24. This was a great post to read for me right now.
    I just started a blog and have yet to upload my first post because of the huge commitment that it is! It’s what I’ve wanted for a long time, but it’s scary making that first step and having to explain to my friends and family that I basically have another full time job.
    I’m new to your blog and glad I stumbled across it 🙂

    • Thanks KP. Congrats on your upcoming blog launch. It is a lot but it’s such a great community. Just take your time and it will grow. I am really grateful I’ve slowly expanded to social media instead of trying to do it all out of the gate. I started with Twitter then once I got comfortable and built a system moved to facebook then instagram and now pinterest. Figure out what works for you.

  25. I agree! Right now blogging is like my 4th job after being a wife, mom, 1st grade teacher, and then there’s time for my blog and it takes a lot of time. Thankfully I have the night to blog!! 🙂

    • Oh you are a strong woman lol I get wiped out working all day trying to have maintain family, friendships, dating and then trying to blog 6-11 lol sometimes I just want sleep or watch netflix.

  26. I love love LOVE this article. These all ring true. I think the one that I would add is that we’re on our phones as part of our blogging routine not because we don’t care what’s happening IRL. I have so many friends who tell me that I’m on my phone all the time and I have to remind them that I love them but I reaaaally need to send a tweet out with my link.

    • Twitter always gets me because if that notification pops up and I accidently click on it I need to be sure I respond or see if it’s someone I want to follow back because if I close it they may get lost in my phone lol

  27. Yes! In addition to my blog I also work part time as a travel agent specializing in Disney. It’s amazing how many people think I just travel to Disney all the time and play. I was there last month for training – while there were of course some fun times, we were in training from 8am-5pm every day, inside of a convention center. I also had to spend my own money to get there and pay for the training. It’s not all fun and games, even if it is worth it 🙂

    • Haha yes. I went to a conference in New York last year and had to pay my own way I’ve had a few friends ask if they could be my plus one… I’m like sure if you pay for your way.

  28. This list is so true! I have people in my life who pretend my blog doesn’t exist. I wonder if they’ve ever checked it out, because they certainly don’t say anything. It’s frustrating, because it’s my passion. I fell in love with blogging the moment I started. I don’t make money yet, but it is my goal. Right now, I am just plugging away at it, and enjoying every (well almost every) minute!

    • From what I can see, enjoying it is the first step to making money. I don’t know any bloggers who make money from it who don’t love it and when they stop loving it they move on.
      Yeah I have a few people like that who never mention it and it makes me wonder….do they hate it lol

  29. Very good list – before I started blogging (I write a culinary blog for almost a year and recently I’ve started another blogging project) I didn’t realise how much time it really takes! It’s a real job and even if you see me sitting on FB for hours it doesn’t mean I’m not working! Most likely I’m either promoting my posts, doing research, connecting with people or just reading how to get better! I’m not being mean not answering texts – I’m just busy. If I was at the office, noone would mind, but some people think that since I’m working from home (I’m a freelance graphic designer) I have plenty time on my hands! And I need to start scheduling my social media posts! 😀 What can you recommend to do that?

    • That is a great point if you have an office job and you take 5 hours to answer a text on a Tuesday at noon people know you’re working but if it’s a Saturday at noon about going for lunch and you respond at 3 “Sorry been working,” they think you just didn’t want to go lol
      I use HootSuite for Twitter and Facebook. I’m trying to update graphics on older posts to start using Pinterest more and then I want to try Buffer I know bloggers who swear by it.

  30. This is awesome, I always thought about this, my friends don’t really understand the behind the scenes about blogging, they just thinks it is cool that I am doing it haha. They are very supportive too, I must add!

  31. Such a great post! I am a new blogger and have yet to really dive into “full time” blogging, though, that is my ultimate goal. I’ve worried about a lot of the things that you mention … mostly because I wonder whether I am spending my time wisely. But I’m glad to read that I am anticipating real-life hiccups when blogging full-time and I am still SUPER excited about pursuing the journey. Thanks for the great read!

    • Don’t worry to much abut that. No matter what you do there will always be 85 others things you could/should be doing. I am still finding my groove daily things change all the time. You will be find as long as you love it and you stay true to it. 🙂

    • No! It’s amazing don’t let this deter you. If anything the point of the article was to remind you, that you have a wonderful support system online.

  32. yep yep yep and yep! haha I couldn’t agree more! It’s amazing how much timeeeee actually goes into a blog! I was literally JUST telling my husband that! It’s crazy! But I’m basically addicted to trying to make my blog the best it can be. It’s an obsession. And even though I love it, I get frustrated and tired. I am not even making big $ with it yet. Key word yet lol but I wonder how much effort I’ll be putting in then. Well, dreams are worth it I suppose 🙂
    Danielle Greco – AccordingtoD.com

    • It will be totally worth it. I am also obssesed with my blog and the whole community. I think every waking hour something is done to help my blog. A retweet, a comment, writing a random idea in my google docs lol its insane.

  33. Girl, this could not be more spot on. I sometimes get frustrated about the disconnect between “the real world” and “the blogging/entrepreneur world”. They are completely different mindsets. Let me tell you, the struggle is real trying to explain to people what we do without judgement or tons of questions coming up.

    Great post, thank you for sharing.

    Have a beautiful day!

  34. Out of all the (great) items in this list, I’m cheering over #8. When I announced to my friends that I was starting a blog and intended it to be my career, there was a very clear divide – those who supported me and shared my enthusiasm (even though they may not have fully understood) and those who clearly had to make an effort to “humor” me on my new “project.” It’s amazing how much of a difference a simple (yet genuine) nod and smile can make when you’re sharing stories about a new part of your life.

    • Chrisy I love your blog so I’m so happy you stopped by! I am so glad you had supportive friends. I think the first 3 people I told were amazing and had they not been I dunno how I would of responded .

  35. I loved everything in this post. I wish my friends would get that even though I love writing it doesn’t mean I doesn’t take time, thought and energy. Like I really have to think. Also once I’m on a roll writing no I can solve your problem. Let me finish and then we can talk LOL.

    • Right. I’m the same way… I’ll get an idea and be like “I have to write this now!” or I’ll have ideas when I’m almost asleep but I know I need to write them down so I keep notepad ready by my bed so I can scribble it down.

  36. Haha! This post was spot on! I wish they understood the time it takes and that this is serious for me. 🙂 Also that I can tell when they don’t follow me- ha! I don’t care but don’t lie about it, I didn’t ask you to.

  37. Hey Dia
    How Awesome is this post!
    Whenever I tell my friends I’ve got some blogging work to crack on with in the morning, they honestly have visions of me at my laptop sipping coffee and wasting time. If only they knew, lol. Blogging can sometimes feel like a second job. Luv this post hun.

    • Thank you so much. It’s like
      “sorry I can’t goto blank I have work to do”
      “You don’t work weekends.”
      “”Oh honey I’m always at work.”

  38. I think the sheer amount of work a blog is is often underestimated. I used to blog on a free site, and it was so much easier! Now, there is this huge extra work that you never knew goes into every self-hosted blog you see. Writing is a huge part of blogging, but definitely not the only part, and a lot happens before and after you click “publish” on each post!

    I love this post. Thanks!!

    • Thanks so much Joyce. You put it perfectly. Managing the site and actually trying to get people on it take a lot of time and thought.

  39. OMG my friends always think I’m ignoring them and that blogging is a past time. They don’t comprehend that it takes time and hard work. Off topic: Love Zooey!!! Such a big deal!!! YAY

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