I have a killer squad. Seriously, like watch out Taylor Swift (just kidding, you’re my little blond spirit animal) my group of besties is THAT amazing. Help you move, listen to your crazy… support your crazy, let you borrow clothes, pick you up from the airport kind of amazing. There is something about best friends that allow you to basically say (or text) whatever you think without any judgment. Here are 10 straight from conversations with my besties.
I can’t decide what to wear…I’m going to snapchat my choices to you…Never mind I’m coming over.
You want and respect their opinion. You also respect that they don’t have to invite you over, you just invite yourself. Chances are you even have a key.
Let’s have a baby!
You just saw that Johnson’s and Johnson’s commercial with the worlds cutest baby and had a mini mental break down/ quarter life crisis because you are sure you’re going to die alone and childless. They then respond wanting to know which of you will carry it, or if you should adopt.
What are you doing? I’m at the gas station* by your house and just bought wine. I’m on my way!
You know no matter what they are doing that if you call a formal summit, they will drop it and open their door for you. Also visitors with wine are rarely turned away. In fact the only reason you called ahead was to give her the option to put on pants if she wanted.
If I killed someone would you help me hide the body? I think today is the day I go full on batshit crazy. Help!
Be it a coworker, a significant other, a family member or just an aggressive shopper at Macy’s, sometimes you feel the rage, and although you wouldn’t ever actually attack someone it’s reassuring to know someone would have your back on the witness stand.
What are we doing tonight?
It’s Friday night, obviously we’re hanging out and if for some reason you had other plans like a date, I would have known in advance… duh!
So I need to ask you something to make sure I’m not being a bitch
You know that comment that flew out of your mouth. That text you sent while feeling the above mentioned rage. This is when we need our best friend’s honest opinion. They might not tell you what you want to hear, No you are TOTALLY not being a bitch, and she’s in the wrong.” But they will tell you what you need to hear, “Well someone had a bowl of bitch flakes this morning! What’s wrong, because you are clearly taking out your frustration on the wrong person love. Apologize.”
I had to be at the airport at 5a.m. and didn’t see your car at home are you okay? Should I call the cops?
Awe you care! Quite possibly it’s just your friend being nosy or wondering what you did last night and why you didn’t invite them, but you also know part of them is slightly concerned when your car isn’t where you normally park it.
I love the smell of fresh cut lemons
Because some things make you happy and you just want to share.
See what happens when you don’t hang out with me, I watch Switched at birth on Netflix and cry!
The good ole fashion bestie guilt trip. I must admit that I’ve done this. Your bestie goes home for the weekend or it’s her anniversary with her S.O. and you just want to send a quick text to let her know that you miss her. Also, without her your downtime involves a lot of Netflixing and crying alone versus Netflix and laughing together.
I’m pissed he hasn’t texted me back yet but also pissed that I’m worried he might be dead!
You refuse to text him again and let him know that you are worried. That’s what your best friend is for. In the back of your head you know your S.O. probably just fell asleep, or whatever lame, absentminded reason they may have for not texting you back, but you have to rant to your bestie to avoid texting yet another angry emoticon.
OMG! Guess what! (Insert piece of good news you just had to tell them first)
The best thing about receiving good news is sharing it with someone you love. Honestly, some good news doesn’t feel real until I’ve gotten to share it with a loved one. It’s always nice to have people in your corner.
Do it for love,
*I’ve bought wine at the gas station more than once, don’t judge me.
Edited by M.L. Scarbrough