This month marks the one year anniversary of my blog. So much is happened in the past year so I thought it might be a good idea to reflect and write a letter to myself before it all began.
You watch way too much t.v. this isn’t a lecture, sorry to start on that. The truth is I know why you do it now. Because you love seeing stories of people doing the things you want to do but are too afraid to.
You love the female voiceovers you hear on shows like Grey’s Anatomy, you love watching Jane get lost while typing away on some romance novel on Jane the Virgin. Well stop watching and start writing.
The next year of your life will bring so many things good and bad so buckle up and just go with it.
You are about to embark on a life changing journey
I know that sounds cheesy, don’t roll your eyes at me. While it will stress you out, keep you up late and make you hate your laptop sometimes, your blog will be your salvation.
You will have two major blows in your life and you will feel a sadness in a way you never have before. You’ll draw strength from the people you love, as well as dozens of people you’ve never met face to face.
You’re going to find your tribe in a way you didn’t know was possible.
What started as a night of being over anxious and the need to do something will lead you on the journey to Blogher 15. It will change your life. Going to New York by yourself will be scary in your mind but in reality ends up being one of the best impulse a decisions you’ve ever made. The first day of the conference you’ll look around this room of hundreds of women of different races and backgrounds and realize that you all have this great thing in common. For the first time you’ll feel this feelings of home you didn’t know was possible in a group of strangers. You’ll make a great friend (shout out to Corrine from The Feminist Feline), you’ll meet some of the kindest people and some of the strongest women. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll find a new fire in your heart for writing. Don’t be afraid, just go!
Stop sticking it out and quit that job that’s making you unhappy.
You’ve been there, the process of job hunting it sucks, I know (after all I’m you). But think of this, you’ve been at your job for over 2 years, you have some impressive experience under your belt. It’s not as frustrating as you’re used to. You’ll hear about a great job from a friend and it will finally be the kick in the pants you need to start looking for jobs that excite you and update that resume.
Also, don’t be afraid to ask for help. The people who love you won’t mind helping you.
You won’t hear back from that job but you will hear back from another the day after applying and you will get it! Because you are kind of fucking awesome. You’ll start and have that feeling once again, “I’ve found my people.” It won’t be all sunshine and rainbows; you will have to learn new things but they are things you want to know. You will find yourself wanting to burst into tears because you haven’t used an IMac since college but ask for a regular mouse…being able to right clicking will take away A LOT of your frustration.
You’ll never regret saying I love you.
You’ll learn this year how fleeting life is. How someone you love can go from present, to there but mentally gone, to totally gone. Rather it’s romantic or platonic, express love. It’s scary to say but when you get the words out it’s a weight off your chest. No matter the outcome you know that they know and that’s all you can ask for sometimes.
Don’t overdo it.
You have always had this blessing/curse of wanting to give things your all. In blogging all that will do is stress you out and put you behind. Don’t try to post a new blog every day, you’re literally just putting crap into the universe, there is enough out of there. Don’t try to participate in every Facebook thread or Twitter chat. Don’t agree to write every article you’re offered. Be patient, I know it’s scary to turn things down but trust me there will be other opportunities as long as you keep keepin on.
You’ll realize you have opinions about major issues and that you’re growing up.
When you start this journey you won’t expect to share some of your deepest secrets with the world, you won’t think you’ll be making public declarations on issues like race in America. But things will happen and you’ll realize you can’t remain silent. People may not agree with you but they don’t have to because you’ll have a true conviction in your heart.
Does that seem like a lot to deal with in a year? It is but you can handle it.
What are some things you’d like to tell yourself a year ago?