It’s my 21st birthday! (Well give or take a few years) My life plan is basically to be 21 till I’m 30… then I’ll be 29. Okay, fine! Today I turn 26! What the hell? My life is nothing like I thought it would be 10 years ago. Hell, my life isn’t where I thought it would be 2 years ago!
If you’d asked me 10 years ago where I would be at 26, I would have told you something pretty impressive.
“Oh, I’ll be on a book tour for my 6th best seller, while on summer hiatus from filming my long running network television show. By 26 I’ll be married about 4 years (Because I met my future husband in college… like on TV.). We’d also have homes in New York, California and Texas.”
Yeah, I’ve always been ambitious. (Oh and I’d also have 2 Teen Choice awards and an Oscar.)
So obviously none of that happened.
I recently published my 100th post…. not my 6th book.
I don’t have my own show, but I have a pretty good starter job.
As far as the husband goes… not even close! In college, I met amazing friends and my adult-life family. I kissed cute boys, shot vodka and danced my ass off (oh no wait that’s still here). I expanded my mind and most importantly I met myself and let me tell you, home girl is complicated, but she’s also kind of a badass.
This past year has been an intense one and a lot has happened- good, bad and everything in-between- but if I was to look back and compare where I was on my 25th birthday to where I am today, I am so much happier. Yes I have my quarter-life-crisis moments where I realize I don’t have much of an idea what the hell I’m doing in any aspect of my life, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing.
Last year I forwent my plan, 4 years in the making, to celebrate my 25th birthday in New York with my best friend because my controlling, insecure asshat of an ex didn’t want me to go anywhere if he couldn’t. Now I’m not only flying to New York this month by my damn self, but I’m doing it to pursue something I love!
I realize that this birthday is a bit of a numerical milestone…. I’m officially closer to my 30 then 20. (Damn… I’m still in shock.)
I will say one thing, I am so glad that I was wrong about life because there wouldn’t be any surprises…but I wouldn’t turn down a waterfront house in San Diego.
Okay so now for the clique part.
As a blogger I am constantly online looking for content inspiration, seeing what others are writing about and how they are continually finding their voice. A popular birthday trend seems to be writing a bucket list for the next year of their lives. I don’t want to do that. I don’t want to set up this list of things to accomplish I want to make positive changes and cut things out that are no good for me anymore. So instead of writing a list of things I want to do by the time I’m 27, I want to write a list of things I don’t want to do while I’m 26, i.e. things that are counterproductive to the person I want to be.
I want to stop making time for people who don’t make time for me.
I’m going to stop spending so much money on going out.
I’m going to stop being shy about my writing. (If you like it, great! If you hate it, your loss!)
I’m going to stop eating out so much (My body and wallet will thank me).
I’m going to stop letting other people project their insecurities on me. (And if you try I will go N’Sync like Bye Bye Bye)
I’m going to stop spending my weekends in my cave hungover. (This will probably be more difficult because each year hangovers have been getting worse! ☹ )
I’m going to stop letting people put their issues on me. (Cancel my subscription because I’m over your issues!)
And now a video from our sponsors (okay not our sponsors but we all know I love me some Melanie Martinez and it seems appropriate for a birthday).
Anyway Happy Birthday to me and all the other Cancer’s this month 🙂
Big shout out to my mom and big sister both having birthdays tomorrow.