My 2nd semester of college I was walking to class when an adorable redhead and a Hispanic girl with pink hair motioned for me to come over and talk to them. It was incredibly intimidating but undeniably intriguing. As I approached them the redhead smiled and asked, “Have you ever thought of joining a sorority?” This turned into a 10 minutes conversation and before I knew it I was walking away saying, “See you tomorrow.”
7 Years, one bachelor’s degree, a lot of smiles and tears later, I have some of my best friends because of that hallway conversation. But to be totally honest not all my best girl friends are sorority sisters and not all my sorority sisters are my best friends. To be honest I don’t even consider some of my sorority sisters my friends and that’s fine with me.
There are too many
Most sororities have recruitment twice a year. During my time as an active member we received anywhere from 4- 20 new pledges each recruitment. Even Taylor Swift doesn’t have that many best friends and everyone wants to be besties with T.Swizzle.
If your sorority takes just 8 girls a year (which is on the low end) and you’re an active collegiate member for 4 years that’s 32 girls on top of the girls who were already members when you joined. Sex and the City showed us how time consuming 4 best friends can be, but 40 best friends?!?! Come on!
You will inevitably clash with some
While it would be amazing if you just wanted to hold hands and sing kumbaya with every member of your chapter 24/7, that is a very unrealistic dream. Think of all the areas of your life: work, family and even the nail place you love, there is probably someone you just don’t get along with or connect with within each category.
Since the beginning of time people have had differences they couldn’t agree to disagree on. 40 sisters means 40 personalities, 40 attitudes and 40 different egos. You may not want to scratch anyone’s eyes out but there will be some you are fine only seeing at official Greek events.
You’re all changing and growing up
While the friends you make in college tend to have the longest shelf life, some friendships are harder to maintain over the years. When that senior you clicked with during your freshman year moves out of state for her dream job, it’s likely texts will be sent less and less. You’ll see each other at the occasional wedding and when you go back for college homecoming or alumni days but it can be hard to maintain those friends that only lasted a short time.
You will also change in your habits, perhaps you’re the friend who got married right after college and has life all planned out, while your former soro bestie is still figuring it out, you may find yourself gravitating more to other friends and that’s okay.
I have sorority sisters I couldn’t imagine life without, that I talk to daily and are a part of my group of best friends. (Because you can’t just have one best friend.)
There are a number of my sisters that I love and talk to from time to time, but don’t consider a best friend. There are sisters I see maybe once a year and its marathon catching up, laughs and wine. I have a number of sisters I run into randomly from time to time, we have a quick genuine exchange, without false promises… “I’ll call you later” or “Lets do lunch.”
My point is, don’t freak out if you don’t want to be around all your sister every second of everyday. That’s a lot of ya-ya.
Do it for love,
Dia
Edited by M.L. Scarbrough