Orlando, Hope, Hate and Love

There is a huge hole in my heart. One that I can’t understand. It seemed like for decades things were improving. Freedom for slaves, voting for women and minorities, gay marriage and transgender rights  and then something like 9/11, the ISIS killings,  Boston bombing, the Sandy Hook massacre and then the Orlando Pulse shooting happen. 

I keep hearing on the news that the act of terrorism that took place Sunday morning June 12th

was the deadly mass shooting in United States History and it makes my heart physically ache.

49 beautiful lives snuffed out when they were just out having a good time. It’s insane to me. I think of the times I went to Gay bars with friends just to dance and get away from guys trying to hit on me, before any club gay or straight just became too exhausting for me.  I think of my lesbian sister who goes to gay establishments with her girlfriend on a regular basis. I think of my friends gay and straight who still go to clubs on a regular basis, who were probably at clubs themselves at the time of the attack.

DON’T BE CONFUSED! This time, it was at a gay club next time it could be at a straight bar or a baseball game or a Walmart, I mean why not? There has already been mass shootings at  high schools, colleges, movie theaters, shopping malls and elementary schools..to name a few. It can happen anywhere to anyone. We are just as lucky to be alive as the people who walked out of that club are to be alive. Then there are the unlucky who didn’t make it. If you haven’t gotten a chance to learn more about those lost during this attack you can learn more about their stories here.

I’m not here to talk about politics

I’m not here to say anyone of the Muslim nation needs to be deported or held in modern concentration camps.

I’m not here to say that all guns should be taken off the streets.

I have opinions about these things but that’s not what I’m here to talk about.

I’m here to talk about humanity.

We have to do better and we have to be better.

It feels like humanity is just a myth at times.

The civil unrest.

The murder.

The hate.

I cry for all of us and our potential fate.

I don’t know how people want to bring children into a world that is so cold and so scary.

Beautiful people lost their lives and many are hurt or injured

How is any human capable of that level of hate?

Everyone keeps saying that hate will always win over love but it’s hard to feel like that’s true sometimes. Hate spreads like wildfire while love tends to spread like molasses. How is it the world keeps getting smarter and making so much progress in technology, science, and medicine but hate and the acts of hate continue to increase? We can find treatments to something as deadly as Ebola but the education of love is lost.

A rising star no longer shines. 

Less than 24 hours before the Pulse tragedy I was learning of another tragedy when 22-year-old Christina Grimmie was gunned down in cold blood. As if the loss of life wasn’t tragic enough some of the responses to this senseless act of violence really shook me.

I was sitting in bed Saturday afternoon looking at this beautiful young woman’s Twitter account. Just hours before her death she had posted an upbeat video, so alive, so happy, inviting people to what she didn’t know would be her last performance,

What some people may not know is Christina’s death wasn’t immediate. Many people had hoped by some miracle she would survive the 3 gunshots she took. After I watched the video in her last tweet I read a comment that I cannot forget and that made my heart break even further.

I’m glad you got shot. Have fun on your deathbed.

I know that this comment was a small comment under what was a truly beautiful amount of kind ones of prayers and condolences but it was just so nasty I thought, “when did we become this way?” I know I should focus on the positive ones and I am trying to but that one I can’t get out of my head. That one I don’t understand. I want to believe that that humans are inherently good and that if something like this happens we all automatically feel compassion and sorrow for the life lost. 

I know people have been trolling others online for decades but how are people this way? We aren’t born with this kind of evil in our heart, we can’t be, I refuse to believe it.

There are so many other cases of this uncontrollable hate. Earlier this month a dear friend of mine lost his 23-year-old cousin to a senseless act of violence. A beautiful mother of 3 was gunned down alongside her boyfriend by her ex-boyfriend just for moving on.

I don’t know how to wrap this post up because if we are being honest, I can’t. I can’t make some great statement about how love overcomes hate, I can’t create some wonderful political plan that will make the gun carrying and anti-gun communities agree. I can’t make everyone happy.

What can I do?

The only thing any of us can really do. I can be better. I can practice love more instead of hate. I can support people who are different and try to understand those differences instead of hate them or fear them. I can teach those around me to the same. I can teach my little sister and my nephew the importance of kindness.

I can speak out against injustice, I can say something when I see it something. I can ask questions when things just don’t seem right.

Right now I can spread some love and try to give hopes for a better tomorrow. Here are a few videos and articles to help us remember that there are a lot more people filled with love than hate out there.

Passenger Learns Grandson Killed In Orlando. What Whole Plane Does Next Leaves Her Stunned

When Mom Sees Waiter Doing This To Son She Grabs Camera. What Happens Next Is Going Viral

24 Teary-Eyed Stories You Must Read About the Touching Kindness of Strangers

As You Scroll Through These 47 Photos, Something Will Become Very Clear. And Everyone Should See It.

This Waitress’ Act Of Kindness Helped A Grieving Family Find Purpose In Tragedy!

Much love and peace to you all,



  1. Cris of Kiss My Tulle

    For me, this isn’t about politics. It’s about heartache. I’m a mom and expecting my second soon. The stories of moms protecting their children (and the children of people they don’t know) while this happened and the people who knew they were going to die and texted their moms – those stories have made this a hard, hard week for me personally. My heart just aches for those lost lives and their family and friends.


    I agree so much. We h ave to do better. We must. What kind of world are we leaving the next generations? it is horrific to contemplate.

  3. candy

    We do have to do better, whole lot better.

  4. Candy

    Such a horrible tragedy. People out enjoying the evening. Don’t blame the guns blame the person behind the gun

  5. Cori

    You talk about the nastiness on the internet, comments to tweets and FB statuses. I think social media is to blame. People are a lot braver from their couches on, hiding behind avatars and screen names, but they wouldn’t dare say something like that to the person’s face.

  6. Brook

    It’s a heartbreaking world out there…sometimes it’s unbelievable how much hatred actually exists. Thank you for sharing your empathetic and compassionate heart on the matter and giving us all a call to action!

  7. Jessica

    I have so many thoughts and feelings about this tragedy that I don’t even know where to begin, but I think you make a wonderful point that in order to be better we all have to do better. We’re all in this together and we can’t allow any room for the hate to bring us down.

  8. Dia

    Thanks Jessica <3

  9. Dia

    I think it actually makes them more likely to be cruel in real life. Doing it online desensitizes them.

  10. Dia


  11. Dia

    It’s scary.

  12. Dia

    I’m sure it does. It’s sad but kind of nice the got some sort of goodbye.

  13. Dia

    I’m not going to get into gun control but the hate behind it and the way hate is ignored or downplayed is horrible.

  14. Dia

    Thanks for stopping by Brook. If it helps one person be better than I hope I helped.

  15. Mimi Rose

    I can completely relate to this post – how can there be so much hate in this world? I can’t physically wrap my mind around the amount of senseless acts of violence that happen every day. The Pulse Shooting in Orlando was truly tragic, and my heart goes out to all those who were killed and their family members. So So sad. 🙁

    Can’t it be time to show each other love and kindness? I hope someday that will be the norm.

  16. Kristen from The Road to Domestication

    The whole thing breaks my heart. And I hate that it’s been turned political so quickly. I feel like there wasn’t enough time to grieve before everyone started taking sides!

  17. Dia

    That’s really all we can work towards I suppose.

  18. Dia

    It sounds so simple, yet people make it so complicated.

  19. Dia

    Exactly. Can’t we just mourn the lives lost.

  20. Leslie Rossi | alifewellconsumed

    what a tragedy! it was horrific and there needs to be changes in the US for sure!

  21. Amber Starr

    The violence in this world scares me and I hate that my children will grow as this being their normal. I Can’t understand how people can be so full of hate and do things such as Orlando. I’ve been avoiding the online comments because they only frustrate and anger me. I think our nation can do so much better on many levels: gun control, acceptance, mental health to name just a few.

  22. Carol Trimmer

    I just have to hope that we’ll look back on this time period 20 years from now and we’ll be in a different place where hate doesn’t rule the day.

  23. Dia

    There needs to be changes in humanity.

  24. Dia

    I worry we never will. we go forward 2 steps then back in 10. The more tolerance grows the more evil those of intolerance gets.

  25. Dia

    I don’t understand it either.

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